Thursday, October 27, 2011

Boise State University

Nobody stopped my sister from going to a private college that was gonna cost her upwards of $40,000 a year to get a bullshit degree. Nobody tried to stop her from dropping out... I guess drawing class was too hard. Now she's in debt for a years tuition toward a degree she'll never get.

So why is it so far fucking fetched for me to go to an out-of-state college? Even if I'm paying $300 a credit at CWI instead of $100 a credit at Peirce (before I transfer to BSU), and working full time to gain my residency... my entire college education in Boise, where I will get a REAL degree, will cost less than one year at the school that everybody encouraged my sister to go to.

On top of that, I'll be gaining real life experience by moving to another state on my own, and persuing something that I believe in. I'll be able to work full time and save money before I jump into college, and i'll have a great subject to write my personal essay about.

I'm gonna do what I want no matter what... I just wish I had some damn support.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

A little peice of joy.

 Love you! I weaved you a cordage bracelet! (It's in the letter.)

Brookly Schmookly,


    
     ... "It is a tough decision, I am sure, to leave what you love, but I know you can do it. You have always been courageous (I know that), but just make the best of what you have because if you don't then you will always be worried about what 'could've been' or what is to come. Like George Lopez says, 'You got this!' Favorite quote of all time :D"...

                                Love always always always, 
Jared Brandon Fahmy


Friday, October 21, 2011

Dreams, Martial Law, Harold Camping and the end of the world...

I experienced a sequence of disturbing dreams last night.
Each one, different than any other dream I'd had before, as far as theme goes. Usually my dreams contain something relatively similar to ones in the past. These were all completely new.
The last dream I had, after I woke up four times to my smoke alarm going off, was the most disgruntling. The dream took place probably between three and four am. I don't remember much, because that's what happens with dreams, but I do remember enough specific detail to be frightened by it.

I was in heavy traffic on a bridge I didn't recognize. The skies were sepia toned and gloomy with hews of pink, nuclear it seemed. There was an open top jeep next to me and the man driving the vehicle was becoming enraged at the traffic. I remember him saying that he was going to kill me. I was confused and a bit frightened, but focused on the road. All the sudden we were all jolted forward. As if traffic was suddenly moving at full speed, but I hadn't pressed the gas petal. Then, just as quickly, I noticed that the bridge suddenly fell off. The lane coming from the other direction was blockaded with steel arrows pointing toward the opening at the end of our lane, as if we were suppose to go into the water. All of us unable to control our vehicles, we spilled into the ocean. The water was just as gloomy as the skies, but a deep indigo color surrounded our vehicles and belongings as they sunk to the bottom and we, somehow, stayed afloat.  I distinctly remember seeing the enraged man's outdated flip phone spiraling down into the depths of the ocean. The water wasn't cold, but it was startling none the less. I wondered if anyone else thought that this was all staged like I did. It all seemed to boil down to a science. We're driving down a bridge, that somehow nobody noticed dropped off at the end, in the middle of the ocean, too far from land to try and swim to shore and live, most of our belongings weren't on us because we were driving, and whatever we did have sunk or was destroyed by the water. The only thing we had was our bodies and the clothes we were wearing. I couldn't help but feel like someone had calculated this and was watching it all unfold. I looked around the water and saw my best friend, Jaiden, floating right next to me, just our heads above the water. We were calm, collected and contemplating while the others scrambled and screamed. We knew that there was no point in worrying, because we weren't going to be left there. We wouldn't have all seemingly floated by magic if whoever set this up wanted us dead.
Then it all went black.
I came into the next scene standing up from my chair in an auditorium full of melancholy souls. I remember that we all looked similar but I can't remember what we were wearing. I was roaming the halls, Jaiden still next to me, silent. The floors were cracked and uneven as if the building had been shaken. I saw some sort of ancient payphone at the end of the hall that I wasn't even sure I knew how to use. I was surprised when it printed out a ticket that apparently would allow me to call out, but as soon as it did, the enraged man walked by without looking at me and said "It's no use. They don't work... and don't let them see you trying." I didn't know who I was going to call anyways. I dropped the ticket when I saw a woman, in surgeon's dressings coming toward me. She grabbed me by my wrist and my elbow, immobilizing my arm, and lead me away from the payphone. The building seemed like it was lit by natural light because I could see dust particles dancing in beams of sunlight. I saw no windows though, just rows of large arched doors leading into huge auditoriums full of people.
The first time Jaiden spoke was when we were in a small, octagonal, isolated room with white stone walls detailed by orange clay. This room had windows, but only an inch or two from the bars was another white stone wall. I don't remember exactly was she had said, but she brought one or two other people into the room that explained that they could see through this all, just like they knew I could. We didn't know exactly what we knew, but we knew that there was more to this than the rest of the captivated population would explore. We knew that we could find a way out if we gathered some information and we knew that whatever we had to do wasn't going to be safe.
I also know somehow that we were in India. Someone, somewhere in the dream had mentioned it.
So even if we did get out, we wouldn't know where to go.

That's all that I remember, but that's pretty much everything.
So when I woke up this morning I thought nothing of the dream other than it was really, really weird. Then, I was driving to school and started thinking about it again. I thought that maybe the dream was about Martial Law coming into order... maybe some sort of premonition.
Then, right as I had this thought, the personalities on the radio said that today marks the first day of the rapture and the end of the world according to the theory of Harold Camping.
The other day, my uncle and I had a conversation about how Martial Law would be the beginning of the rapture and when I put all these coincidences together, I shuttered.

I could most definitely see it happening though... because I can't see the world going on in this way much longer.